Monday, February 21, 2011

Preggers? No, just carrying some extra belly fat


Yesterday I had my annual women exam.  After waiting for 2 hours to see my physician, and welcoming the news that I have a few more years left before I need to start having children, I headed to the grocery store.  A talkative, early twenty something male checked me out.  We started engaging in small talk when it all of a sudden felt too personal.
"School starts in a few days, " He said.
"Oh really, I'm so removed from the school world. I don't have any kids so I guess I just don't pay attention." I replied.
"Really, are you married?" He asked.
"Yes," I replied, starring down at my ring finger.
"Well, are you trying to have kids? He asked.
I so shocked at the question, I started laughing hysterically.  Did grocery boy realize that his question implied asking if I was regularly having intercourse with my husband?
"uhhh, no, not right now" I replied through my laughter.
"Well, have you talked about it?  I hear sometimes it takes a while." He replied.
Really? Was this happening?  Was I discussing my sex life and future child bearing plans with the grocery store checkout man?
"Uhh, yes, but we haven't been married a year yet and are enjoying time alone right now." I said.
He handed me my receipt, wished me a good day throwing in one last piece of advice.
"You aren't getting any younger.  I'd get to it if I were you."

And with that, I headed back to the office.

Later that day I have my weekly meeting with my boss.  As I am getting up to leave his office he has one more question.
"So, I hear you are pregnant." He says very matter of factly.
"Uhh, what? Really? No. No. No. I am not pregnant.  I uhhh, I think I gained a few pounds." I reply uncomfortable with the question, I look down at my belly instinctively rubbing it.
"It is okay if you are. You can tell me." He says.
"Really, no I am not pregnant. I promise.  Are you pregnant?" I ask him.
He looks down at his stomach confused by the question.
As I run out of his office I catch the look on his face that says he does not believe me.  He thinks I am pregnant.

I am not pregnant.  I gained a few pounds.

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