Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Pep talk from the BossMan

My boss is a small set Indian man (dot head Indian, not native American), a year younger than I.  We have a complicated relationship.  One day you will find me comparing him to the North Korean government and another, he is more like a brother.  It is very much so a love hate relationship.  I sat in his office attempting to go over work items.  He was in an extra chipper and playful mood, avoiding all work related inquiries.  Here is how our conversation went today.

BossMan:   What is going on with you? 
Me:            Not much, you? 
BossMan:    I mean, you are so happy.  You have a glow to you. 
Me:            A glow?  I got my hair highlighted.  That is it.  
BossMan:   What color was it before?  
Me:            Brown.  Now it is back to blonde.  It was brown all year. 
BossMan:    I don't think that is it.  It is something else.  Really, you have a 
                  special glow.  What are you not telling me?
Me:            What? Nothing.  I am probably just hot from being outside in this 
                  100 degree weather.

He continues starring me down when I figure it out. 

Me:             Are you trying to ask me if I am pregnant? 

He looks at me and smiles. 

BossMan:       Are you? 
Me:               Seriously?! This again?  No.  Is your wife pregnant?  
BossMan:       I don't know.
Me:               Do you think I am getting fat? 
Bossman:      No, I just think you are pregnant.  What are you waiting for?  Time
                    will keep moving along and you will keep getting older.  
Me:               Well, who knows, maybe I am and don't know it yet.  I'll let you 
                    know if I get my period next week.
Now the conversation is over (so I think). I know any mention of a menstrual cycle to a man is a sure way to end a conversation. 

He proceeds to show me a picture of an old lady on the his phone, implying my future. This is third time he has asked me if I was pregnant, only this time he put the pressure on reminding me of my biological clock. 
Thanks for the pep talk BossMan.  Still Baby-less.

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