Thursday, July 14, 2011

Suburbs, kids and mini-vans make me sweat

We spent the weekend with cousins in Chicago. They live in a beautiful Chicago suburb with three gorgeous high energy girls under the age of four.  This is no cookie cutter house with newly planted trees suburbia that they live in.  This is the all-American, small town, blissful suburb, with huge old trees aligning quiet streets and houses with white picket fences.  This is the kind of suburb that makes us baby-less city dwellers want to pack up our condo and move our lives to small town suburbia. 

They are living the life most people dream of and that I have feared for most my life.   Why do I fear a family of my own and a house?  Why do I make it such a big deal?  This is the good life, right?  It is what we are meant to do. They are genuinely happy.  There is a reason people pick up and eventually move to the suburbs and have children. I don't think my friends and family are faking their happiness.  I truly think it works.  I've seen it with my own eyes.  I'm just not sure if it is going to work for me.  When I think of the living in the suburbs with kids of my own running around, I think of the opening song of Weeds
A life with kids in the suburbs with mini-vans (our cousins also have a new mini-van complete with all the helpful gadgets) makes me start to sweat and panic.  Living in our cousins world for a few days, made me realize it isn't as bad as I have made it out in my head.  In fact, it isn't bad at all.  Now if only I could find a suburb like theirs in Texas.  

When we got home, I spent the entire day in bed recovering from the excitement of three kids wondering how I would ever be able to do it. I was back to square one, comfortable in my baby-less world.  How would I ever be ready for kids, suburbs and possibly a minivan?  Husband, on the other hand, had a different reaction.  
"Let's get us one of those," he said.  
I starred at him speechless.   

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