Monday, July 25, 2011

Proper yoga attire should be required

I managed to make it inside the yoga studio tonight even though it is 105 degrees outside. This is a big accomplishment for me.  I often make it to the hot yoga parking lot, and never into the hot yoga studio.  Choosing food over exercise is a never ending battle in my world.  I am apparently the only one using the excuse of the outside heat not to go to yoga because the studio was packed.  Sweaty yogis filled the studio with mats laid out only about a foot apart from each other.  This can get uncomfortable in a 105 degree room.  Proper etiquette is to only look at yourself during class.  I don't want anyone looking at me, so I do my best to follow the rule. I couldn't help but notice an attractive man probably in his late 30's was in front of me.   I didn't notice him until standing bow pulling pose. Here is an example of the pose. 
As his leg flies up into the air, his sweaty, hairy balls fall into my view.  He wore running shorts instead of the appropriate, tight fitting yoga attire.  This is the reason yogi's wear spandex! Nobody needs to see sweaty, foreign balls in their face while trying to find yogi inner peace.  I tried not to look, but how could I not?  I noticed the lady next to me focus on the balls as well.  She nodded to me with a look of sympathy.  Was this really happening?  Yes. Onto the next pose. 
And there again, sweaty balls in my line of vision.  There is no way I can concentrate on a pose viewing genitalia.  I stand still, awaiting the next pose as I hear the instructor call my name. 
"What are you doing just hanging out?  Get back in the pose!"  
I wanted to motion her over so she could see exactly what the problem was.  Instead I attempted to get back in the pose again.  This time, my body starts to shake.  My laughter takes over my body.  The harder I try to hold it in, the more my body shakes.  My laugh is not soft and feminine.  When I laugh, conversations stop.  It is a loud, sometimes shocking type of howling noise.  I walk out class, not finishing with visions of sweaty, hairy balls haunting my thoughts.  The more I try to black them out, the more I see them.  Please consider others when dressing for yoga. 

1 comment:

  1. Wow. This is when I am thankful that a)most of my yoga class are women, and b)people in my class dress appropriately!